Catching up...or something like that

Dear Friends,

Oh, how I have missed you (like seriously, missed you!).  I have missed staying caught up with your lives, living vicariously though your dreams and being there with you on your best days and and also on your hardest.  Life has handed me a bit of a challenge--and that challenge is to learn how to focus on what is most important.  Unfortunately, that doesn't involve perusing blogs, it doesn't involve looking for much inspiration in the colorful creations of others...rather, it means relying on the essential.  It also hasn't found time for me to develop many talents (including writing; keeping up on the blog), as I either don't have time or just need some time to rest and be still with my husband.  

That said, please forgive me for late birthday wishes, congratulations that needed to be spoken for the end of finals and graduation events and basically the overdue cheering on your most important milestones.  To some, these things may seem small...and perfectly acceptable to be forgotten (or even mentioned late), but it BUGS me that I can't be super woman.  It really eats at my self-worth that I can't do everything right, and oftentimes totally fail at making up for times when I just do it all wrong. 

Oh...wait.  You didn't come here for a pity-party OR a laundry list of faults (because trust me...I was just getting started.  I could keep you here all day...).  You came to see how we were doing, and let me tell you--life is good.  Stressful, yes.  Hard, yes.  A struggle sometimes (especially to get out the door to exercise, or to peel ourselves out of bed at 5:40-something-am for work), oh yea baby!  However, there really are the best of rewards.  There is much love in our new home.  Yes, that is right, we moved into a town home.  A place we call our home, and we love it.  But mostly, we love each other most.  We are constantly trying to work on making our communication better, on saying the little things more, and on trying to understand the bigger picture, rather then just getting upset at, for example, the jerk that cut us off (I'm mostly still working on that one!) and applying that to work/school/family/etc.  We would love to have our family grow, but are realizing that will happen in the Lord's time.  At the end of the day, we are especially grateful for a loving Heavenly Father that helped us to find each other, so that we can continue to work on the hard things together and be made stronger together too--all so that we are ready to help those around us.

Work is good--so busy, and such a time of growth, but it is good.  I was feeling sorry for myself the other day, and in doing some self-talk, started to have the following conversation:

-"Megan, exercising is sometimes hard, and sometimes you really just try to avoid it"

-"well, yes..."

-"Well, what if Heavenly Father is trying to prepare you for something?  What if He is trying to get you ready for the marathon you'll need to run as a mom...what if there is something else coming that you need this spiritual muscle growth for...did you think of that?"

-"Well, I do enjoy the results of a good work out program...and the sense of accomplishment that comes from mastering something with hard work...hum, I wonder what is coming..."

Who knows...but for now, I will do my best not to avoid the exercise, but to embrace it.  I will try to look for opportunities to be better, instead of slipping down to the comfortable and missing the toned muscle in my heart and mind.  Can you tell I've been thinking a lot about exercise lately?  Might have something to do with Biggest Loser...and my own personal goals...yea, probably something like that.  In anycase, I need to sign off for now.  My sweet husband is ready for our study time.

Sweet dreams to all of you as well.  I am not M.I.A. Promise.  Just trying to find my place so that I can tell you more about it soon enough.

Hugs,

Megan